Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Why is it that the majority of my readers are women ?

That question has been on my mind lately, as it was very evident to me that the majority of the people who read my posts and comment are women (except perhaps for observer & the occasional qwaider) , then it kind of hit me today when I came across a comment by enigma on ChiKapaPPi's post that went like:
LOL all we have to do is boycott the male blogs for a day and see what happens to them!!! I bet you they won’t get more than one or two comments!! yalla girls BOYCOTT THE MALE BLOGS!

and I thought to myself how true is that ?

Now really its so evident now, maybe I do have some other readers but am sure as hell never hear from.

So since I read that this afternoon I was trying to think of reasons, now one thing that came to mind first and for most is that women in the blogosphere when they read something that they like they let you know. Now some might say a "thank you" comment on a post doesn't add much to the conversation but it sure is nice as hell to read those after spending some time writing a post. It's such a rare event for me to come over a post where it was a guy posting such a comment.

Most of the posts that i see on daily bases are mainly light hearted posts, maybe the reason is that women are more in tuned with their emotional side and are able to express their emotions more freely. Or as I like to think of it that growing up as a man in this environment it wasn't one of the skills that we were encouraged to develop. So naturally when its a light hearted post when you go over it and read it as a man you might have something to say but most of the time you wouldn't since you feel like the way you parse those series of events or happening are particular to you and your comment will not add much substance to the conversation.

Which brings me to the next point, post something political and you will notice the testerones drawing their guns quicker than a jarhead in Falluja. Thats the other thing, guys love confrontation. nothing beats the sensation of being able to place your head a micrometer higher than your peers. It's the type of factual regituration than we excel at. To boost we get to express our opinion, which we are a bit on the narcissistic side when it comes towards how we feel about it.

So naturally the conversation devolves quickly into snark attacks and women steer quite clear of that quagmire.

Now one playground that we tend to meet at is the sexual and religious playing ground, which observer excels at capitalizing on something that I really like about his blog is that it melds the boundary between the two camps. Even there it is quite amusing to see how each behave, in that area especially while you would expect the V camp to be quite timid and shy they tend to be the more encompassing and accepting of new outlooks and ideas. On the other hand the T camp tends to be their same old self of "what I say is the right thing and there is no comprise about it. if you are not willing to bend backwards or shut up am going to start the insults". Now am not excluding myself from that saying since at certain posts and blogs i tend to be a big pain in the @$, and i draw a certain pleasure out of being a smart @$ especially when the blogger is a bit full of himself (yes, am thinking of one blog that I like the posts and the way he tackles things but his personality of being so high and righteous really irks me)
I only came across one case of that when it was a female blogger and she is a special case i think, a couple of screws got loose in her head and she holds a grudge against so i go and bother her every once in a while :P

Also one other thing I noticed about bloggerettes is that they are never content with a paper thin representation of anyone that they are curious about (I cross my heart i meant this in the most utterly benign way and even though stating it so bluntly might put me in a grey area i would prefer it rather than leaving it up to interpretation). They are actually genuinely interested in constructing a 3-d perspective of who that person is, and they tend to look at him more as a person than an faceless avatar. With guys i rarely feel that they are interested beyond that specific instance of interaction and although there might be previous interactions it doesn't hold much weight in consequent communication unless it caused a stark polarization...

Thats what occurs to me so far, maybe am just over analyzing and guys simply don't fancy anything am writing about.

would welcome any additional, or even counter points regarding this.

now for the puzzle of the day... perception

M N P O F I H Z S L H S L I
Y E D P O S T I U L D A L G
K X R E A D E R S G R G I E
Y T M E N T I O N R I H W I
M G X K N O I T P E C R E P

Hint: what am i going to talk about next

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23 Comments:

  • Guys liking to argue has a term, it's called "Dick swinging" hehehe, they take it out and hit each others on the head with it. hehehehe

    Anyhoooooo, I donno why women only read your blog, I think all people read it but as you said only women comment. But your blog has layers and women like layers to peel and discover, as you said we like to probe.

    Ok you know what I am off too now :p

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 31/10/07 03:24  

  • off to not too .. geez

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 31/10/07 03:24  

  • That's such a good observation. I agree with you on most of the stuff
    However, many of the guys are interested of paining a 3-D image of the lady they're arguing or discussing with. It might be for alter motivations. But nevertheless it's one of the items being taken into account

    I don't think the discussions are all guy-guy or girl-girl, there are many cross gender instances where people and groups tend to be on one side, while others on the others with some more lying all in between

    But I have to admit, I tend to get stuck in that ugly camp of "I know everything" and I'm really trying to get out of it, and really knowing about the thing doesn't really count, you fall in that camp whether I like it or not. But I think maybe with time I will learn to get out of it

    Oh and I didn't play with the riddle ... :(

    By Blogger Qwaider قويدر, At 31/10/07 03:31  

  • OK I have words

    Next post will mention perception.

    And I have the word peek and others too that I can't fit it.

    I could be totally off :P

    by the way, pssssssst , who are those 2 bloggers , :D heheheeheh.

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 31/10/07 04:24  

  • oh I forogt one word, dang it

    next post will mention readers perception.

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 31/10/07 04:24  

  • psssst 7aki u got it but ur missing a few my's and switch the last two and u almost got it

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 31/10/07 04:51  

  • BB, I wondered the same thing, here 7aki and I comment all the time, wayn ishabaab? Sometimes a blog can get hijacked by commentors, but I don't think she and I are hijacker types.

    Maybe some are intimidated because you are a bit snarky, but also know what you are talking about. I decided awhile back you aren't as tough as you appear, so I was safe here. :)

    Qwaider, very transparent of you to be aware of the tendency and moving away from it. :)

    By Anonymous kinzi, At 31/10/07 09:10  

  • 7aki SWORD FIGHT ! lol
    i wasn't really talking specifically about my blog, i was talking a bit more general as i like my blog and you guys just the way they are.
    *gets ideas to add "onion" some where in the name*
    ohhh and the two bloggers 7aki maybe i should have made the puzzle on that
    one is a blog that keeps on spamming qwaider planet with so many cut and past posts that its annoying
    the other is what could be unanimously called the most well regarded blog around qwaider planet but that guy never comments if any body notices barely on his own posts

    Q Call me cynical but if i would generalize i think the only case would be for ulterior motives, and yes you can shoot down my generalization but to me it has been almost clear cut in that way. especially when it comes to slightly off hand ideas.

    I actually think we all do Q, and doing something to change that is what matters since other than it being annoying, it will limit the conversation. so many times i came off as snarky and mean that there is a blog where i always get the husband to reply to my comments instead of the wife who is the blog owner :P

    kinzi hmm what do u mean by hijacking ?
    golly i do come off as snarky but i don't get the tough as you might sound part and am glad it turned out that way since u always add a different perspective to any post. Thats why i have so much respect for u in that regard.

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 31/10/07 10:27  

  • Well, I agree with you on this more than disagree. With a few exceptions here and there
    And what the hell are you doing on married people's blogs? :)

    By Blogger Qwaider قويدر, At 31/10/07 10:55  

  • lol what do u mean by married people ?

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 31/10/07 11:20  

  • I'll have to email you about the hikackers.

    I can't remember where I saw you comment first, but I remember being a little intimidated. Most people who see I have a different opinion either ignore or throw contempt, but i saw you weren't'that way. Thanks for the welcome!

    Hope you always visit married people's blogs!

    By Anonymous kinzi, At 31/10/07 13:45  

  • yupper kinzi, and yeah u reminded me there is a little thing that i might need a bit of advice on so i'll be sending u an email soon

    I just love being standard issue, fresh out of the Transmogrifier (my gut feeling tells me u like calvin and hobbes)

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 31/10/07 14:02  

  • Am assuming you are happy about that,right??

    For me it's simple,I pick blogs where things are civil, no rude comments and replies even if they weren't directed at me..Personally this is my break from the hectic busy real life,the news and the world,it has to be enjoyable plain and simple..
    Although sometimes what you write need every single brain cell to get,(those are needed for work),I still appreciate the effort you put in it and leaving a small comment is my way of saying so :)
    You are right that may be we try to see the a face or a personality behind the words too :)

    By Blogger Noura, At 31/10/07 18:36  

  • Ihad a feeling it was those 2.

    Yeah you should call ur blog bambams onion.

    By the way, somewhere I read you were wondering why people thought you were a woman cos of the name bambam, well, it's like Bambi which is cute, and then the blog is called non angel which is also cute, and guys just don't do cute.

    I know bam bam is supposed to be the gun sound but psssst, it should be bang bang :p

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 1/11/07 10:23  

  • noura hey thanks :) and you always remind me about skipping music playlists

    7aki lol, shoo cute 2o ma cute hai fein 2asrifha, i know its trade marked but i can't help it, FA3ESS. gal bambi gal ...

    nooooooo, no gun shots not at all, bambam is my nickname cause of my family name or for the ppl who see it the first time they think of bambam fred flinstones son ? the blunt dij boy which am also fine with

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 1/11/07 10:32  

  • bamboozled! well women talk more, and demographically, women are more than men in the world, so evidently women will have more blogs than guys and will wanna check out everyone's blog since we're also curious by nature :D

    By Blogger PŕōuđPāŀĩ, At 1/11/07 15:02  

  • ahaaaaaaaaa, 2oltillyy, well DUH, now I get it, the whole bambam thing.

    So inta Dij, LOL.

    Khalas this is the last commentm I am leaving, man this is not a chat room it's a POST :p

    By Blogger 7aki Fadi, At 1/11/07 18:04  

  • i think the type of commenters pre gendre discussion can be a good indicator for a person's level of thinking and his/her thinking boundaries and orientation, like you can find blogs that attract a certain age group, topic oriented people, common interest, or any other categories depending on the blogger

    the thing is we are part of a small network, were commenters are mostly in Jordan or arab expats,, so we are roaming in the sphere in relative thoughts, interests so we can say we are talking about regional blogs.

    concerning your blog, i dont see it as a majority of women, but a variety of age groups which is cool and you are gentleman like when you speak to women which is missing in half of arab men!!! hint hint all you guys! but regarding guys commenting,, i agree with kinzi on snarkiness,, i think you have quite a lot of readers who dont comment cause you can't be argued against! and yup guys like debate but they dont like to lose as well so coming here is killing their chances of ego boost! if you can write in a more provokative manner on a topic i bet you will get guys talking :P

    By Blogger THUNDER, At 3/11/07 02:53  

  • Eh, so am I off the hook? I see too many women commenting already..so I guess no need for me to comment too..phew

    I don't know if I have more men or more women reading my blog..hmmmm...

    By Blogger Completely Anonymous and 100% Private, At 4/11/07 14:13  

  • Well, I think that female bloggers in Arabia just have more substance really. You said it, guys, especially Arab guys have big egos so whatever opinion they may have, they're going to take it personal against you, and it just makes the commenting process a bit boring. It's just an opinion for God's sake. Anyway, if I didn't have such a big mouth, I would've stopped commenting on those blogs long time ago, I think I should put that plan into effect.

    As for the blogger, I think I have an idea who you are talking about. I promised myself to never comment there again actually! Too much attitude! (That is if we're talking about the same bloke).

    By Anonymous Made in Jordan, At 13/11/07 15:18  

  • lol privanon i think u have a lot more guys than girls on ur blog :P
    pheraslol yeah i try not to comment there but i had to make an exception recently :P
    actually i like big mouths that way people get exposed to more sides to an argument and i usually argue hoping that someone reading it might change his mind rather than the person i am arguing with :D

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 13/11/07 18:13  

  • Yes I notices..It's sad that my blog is starting to echo my real life (a lot more guy friends than girl friends) hehehe

    I also work with more men

    Ya3ni men men men men everywhere..why why?

    I need to steal your women readers

    By Blogger Completely Anonymous and 100% Private, At 14/11/07 10:21  

  • no, no stealing, stealing is bad for your health.
    hehe hey we are not all bad :P

    By Blogger No_Angel, At 14/11/07 11:29  

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